


as we lay together

by HogwartsToAlexandria



Series: Marie's HP shorts 2020 [6]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Voldemort, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Communication, Confessions, Dirty Talk, Established Relationship, First Time, Fluff, M/M, Marauders, Marauders Friendship (Harry Potter), Past Child Abuse, Scars, Severus Snape Has a Heart, Sirius Black is a Good Boyfriend, Snark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:20:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24965137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HogwartsToAlexandria/pseuds/HogwartsToAlexandria
Summary: Their friends wouldn't believe them, not until Sirius insisted at least, but the truth is, the day he and Severus had sex the way they'd all implied, it meant something. It truly did, and neither of them were sorry they hadn't rushed into it.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Severus Snape
Series: Marie's HP shorts 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1747861
Comments: 4
Kudos: 81
Collections: Daily Deviant





	as we lay together

**Author's Note:**

  * For [r_grayjoy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/r_grayjoy/gifts).



> Hey! This was my entry for the Birthday Wishes of the Daily Deviant DW comm, a gift for r_grayjoy that I'm reposting here since author reveals happened today 😊
> 
> Thank you to Betheflame for beta-ing and cheering as she always does. 
> 
> Hope you like this 😊

"You two have _never_ ...?" Potter asked, his mouth open in an "O" that made Severus' leg bounce under their table at the _Three GroomSticks_ \- _"a little more fun than the Broomsticks, but just a bar,"_ Sirius had promised him to convince Severus to come with him. That the ‘little more fun’ meant most people, of any gender whatsoever, had favoured rather sheer outfits and didn't seem to shy away from snogging whoever was willing around them did not surprise Severus. Not in the least. 

"Nope," Sirius popped the consonants, while their friends kept watching both of them in turn, dubious as they drank their own due sips for James' turn of ‘Never Have I Ever’. 

Severus Snape did not blush. Or feel self-conscious about the simple fact that he and Sirius had yet to have sex the way the others thought they had. 

He did appreciate the gentle hand Sirius set on his knee a few moments later though, and did not put much energy into shrugging him off when the man kissed his cheek while the others weren't looking. Severus met Sirius' searching gaze a little warily, only to find the way he looked at him, both hungrily and gently, warmed something inside him he'd been trying hard to ignore since their relationship had started almost a year prior. There were too many variables to consider, too many barriers he had to let go off, and even though there had been some heavy petting done over the months and Severus had the same urges most sexual twenty-somethings experienced, it still unnerved him that his want for Sirius only seemed to grow with time. 

"Don't listen to them," Sirius whispered in his ear a little farther into the night, the same hand that had been resting on his knee searching for Severus' hand and squeezing it when Severus let him take it. 

And then again, another while after, when Lupin and McKinnon were busy dancing in their bubble in the middle of the other partygoers and Potter couldn't stop gazing at Lily to save his life - she wasn't faring much better - Sirius cupped his jaw and Severus was the one to close the distance and kiss him, grateful for the low lights of the bar. 

"That looks great on you," Sirius said against his lips. 

Severus just quirked an eyebrow up in question, not certain he was ready for the answer. 

"Kissed out and pretty," Sirius grinned. 

* * *

Tonight was apparently the night. 

They were in one of the bedrooms at Lupin and McKinnon's flat, alone for the night as the two of them were staying at the girl's parents and _they_ were staying here for a week before they all had to go about their lives, back to work after the short spring holidays they'd all managed to place somehow. 

Being put into the same room right off the bat and without anyone batting an eyelash was both a surprise and a wonder to Severus, and now that the night had settled and they were all alone, it gave him even more reasons to feel so. At least the mattress and sheets were comfortable and pleasant to the touch, so if Severus lost his sanity listening to all the babble coming out of Sirius' mouth, he would at least have that to fall back onto. 

Reining in his amusement was difficult, to say the least, even if it flirted with annoyance too. 

"Need to feel you, need to feel you so bad," Sirius was mouthing at his neck, his hands roaming his body until he remembered he was actually trying to undress him and got back to unbuttoning Severus' shirt. 

Severus just laid there, practically keeping his arms out of the way of Sirius' near-frantic petting and he'd been staying that way ever since the other man had pushed him down on the bed, not sure if he should let himself laugh or make his tentative boyfriend calm the bloody fuck down. He awkwardly put his hands on Sirius' hips, and pushed him away in the end. 

"What?" Sirius kneeled back immediately, and then his eyes widened in horror, "Oh my God I'm such an arsehole, I'm going too fast, am I not?" 

"You are not taking your time, indeed," Severus said slowly, only letting his lips form a small smile to quiet the instant guilt that started filling Sirius' eyes. "You're not any more of an arsehole than you usually are for it though." 

"Oy!" Sirius pushed him playfully, "How do you want to do this then?" 

"Not _how_ , with _whom_ , and the answer is, not Padfoot."

"Mean," Sirius pretended to pout. 

"Possibly," Severus tucked a strand of hair behind his ear, once again regretting having cut it to under his jaw - it didn't fall down as often when it was longer. Sirius caught his hand in mid-air though, and linked their fingers together by Severus' head before straddling his hips and looming over him in a much slower, much smoother way. 

"Better like this?" Sirius' asked, leaning down to press their lips together so, _so_ , slowly. 

Severus hummed, running the fingers of his free hand down Sirius's back. 

"Better… like this?" Sirius whispered in his ear hotly, only to flick his tongue at Severus' earlobe and sucking it between his teeth on the next breath. 

Severus' breathing hitched, his stomach sinking in at the wet sensation. 

"How about this?" Sirius asked, his own free hand sneaking down Severus' stomach, his thighs holding him a little higher so he could find Severus' erection where it pressed against the fabric of his trousers. 

Forming words proved difficult, especially when Severus couldn't help but buck into his boyfriend's touch, his eyes widening a bit as the pleasure it sparked inside him. Sirius stared right at his face, smiling like the devil as he kept stroking him gently. 

"You're going to love sex, Sev," Sirius said, and grinned all that much harder when Severus couldn't help but huff. 

"Thinking very highly of yourself once more, Black," he told him. He sounded out of breath, he knew he did, but it was worth it, if only for the joy of seeing Sirius faking another annoying pout. 

"Can we lose some clothes?"

That brought Severus right back down to earth, and his tensing must have been quite visible because Sirius took his hand away again and sat up in Severus' lap. 

"We don't have to." 

Dread and disgust were wading through his brain, tainting his prior arousal faster than Severus could shake his head. But he did, he shook his head and held onto Sirius' hand with everything he had. 

"I want to," he told him, "I just…"

"If you're not ready, Severus, I'll be ready when you are, I've told you," Sirius said, his eyes so earnest Severus felt a chill running down his spine. 

Why couldn't he just be normal, why couldn't he just enjoy the same things people their age seemed to enjoy, why couldn't he just want sex and not feel like the minute his clothes came off, Sirius would run away and lock himself to sleep in another room. Why was he so scared of losing him, over something so simple.

“I have scars.” Severus found himself blurting. “Big, ugly, disgusting scars.”

Sirius frowned at him, and then instead of saying anything at all, he screwed his eyes shut, blinked a few times and then leaned down again, and Severus didn’t know if they’d ever kissed like they did then. Sirius’ hands were everywhere at once again, over his cheeks and in his neck, threading fingers in his hair and squeezing his shoulders but instead of feeling overwhelmed by them, Severus let himself do the same, let himself swim in the comfort of feeling Sirius’ body under his palms and searching fingers. 

This part, they’d done before - kissing each other senseless and roaming their hands over every inch of clothed body they had available. But Severus had always either made sure they were both done well before clothes got brought up, or had plain refused to rid himself of anything that wasn’t his trousers, socks and shoes. Sirius had never pushed, no matter how worried and certain Severus had been that he would. He had a reputation at school after all. He’d slept with all these people who’d then told all kinds of stories that Severus both didn’t want to hear and couldn’t help but listen to intently, albeit discreetly. 

Nothing they’d ever done together had ever matched Severus’ expectations of his boyfriend. He held on to that, hard, with both hands and most of his brain power when he pushed Sirius away again. Enough so that they could both sit up. Enough so that he could untuck his shirt from the waistband of his trousers. Enough so that he had to close his eyes when he started unbuttoning it and Sirius’ gaze was too careful, and too awed to handle. 

His hands trembled and Severus bit the inside of his cheeks hard by the time the lapels of his shirt hung open and he blinked his eyes open again when nothing happened. 

Sirius was watching his face, not his scars. He was looking directly into his eyes now that they were open and telling him more in no words than he sometimes did in entire rambled rants. 

“Can I touch you?” he said, and Severus heard the need there. He didn’t understand it, he wasn’t sure he was comfortable with it either, but he wanted to try, he wanted Sirius’ hands on him, so dearly it almost hurt. 

"Yes, please do," Severus said, and tensed and relaxed almost as soon as Sirius did so. 

The man kept looking at him as he passed his hands under Severus' shirt, at his waist first and then up his ribs, humming soothingly when his fingers brushed the edges of the scars that littered Severus' back, and kept going up. 

"You feel so good," Sirius breathed when his hands reached his shoulders and he squeezed them, making the fabric ride up and away from Severus' chest. 

And then he unthinkably leaned down, and Severus watched him press his lips to the biggest of his scars, yet the least painful of them. 

"Heart surgery," Severus explained between teeth gritted in nerves.

Sirius hummed in question this time, but kept his head where it was. He dropped small kisses all along Severus’ scar, and then, when he pushed his shirt off his shoulders and Severus let it fall off his arms, Sirius took the shirt out of the way and brought him down till Severus’ back was back on the mattress. 

“Muggle medicine. My father hated magic,” Severus said when Sirius gave him a questioning glance and he realized he hadn’t explained. 

Sirius frowned, but nodded anyway.

“You’ll tell me whenever you want to, even if that’s never,” he said, and then he took off his own shirt, and even though Severus had seen his chest plenty of times, those strong arms and the beautiful black ink he had littering his pecs and ribcage, seeing him in this context, here with him, it felt different.

“You look… good,” Severus managed to say, and smiled in kind when Sirius chuckled.

“Thank you, handsome,” 

“I’m not--”

“We have had this discussion before,” Sirius said, unbuckling his belt at the same time which Severus tried very hard not to react to but the reflexive flinch that left him at the sound of the metal clicking together and the swishing of the leather in their belt loops… Sirius saw. Of course he did. “You tried to hide that.” he remarked, his tone carefully neutral. “It's not the first time either. You don’t have to, okay?” 

And just as Severus was getting annoyed, Sirius shushed him with a gentle finger on his lips. 

“I may not have this,” he said, glancing at Severus’ chest, “but wizards are very inventive when it comes to hurting their kids without leaving marks.” 

There was a heaviness in the air, a need that wasn’t arousal at all anymore but that made Severus reach for Sirius this time. Unlike so many other moments in their relationship, this gripping feeling inside them both just made him grab Sirius’ waist and bring him down, against his chest, their skins meeting naked for the first time ever. 

Severus buried his nose in Sirius' hair, his hands skimming invisible scars on the man's back while Sirius dropped gentle kisses in his neck. It took a moment of gathering each other's wits and feelings before Severus decided to turn things around, for once in this madness of a relationship, he thought maybe he could be the one to take charge, if only for a while. 

So that's what he did. 

He secured his arms around Sirius, pushed on his feet for leverage and rolled them over, until Sirius was the one on his back, his legs parted to make room for Severus' body. 

"That's…" Sirius started, arousal flashing in his eyes again, "I always forget how strong you are," 

Severus gave him a smug little smirk, before he leaned down again. 

"Better like this," he echoed Sirius' earlier question, slotting their hips together when Sirius gasped. 

Only then did their trousers and pants finally start to feel like they were in the way instead of the protective barriers Severus had thought them to be before. He watched Sirius' face as he put his hands at the man's waistband, and a little shakily, proceeded to snap it open and down once he nodded. 

In one, almost, smooth go, Severus managed to rid Sirius of his remaining clothes, tugging on his socks with a smile when his boyfriend squirmed.

"Tickles," he laughed. 

"Child," Severus retorted. 

"I need you," Sirius whined in turn, very obviously canting his hips up to bring Severus' attention down to the way his cock jutted from his pelvis, flushed and hard and too beautiful, almost intimidating. "Touch me, Sev, please,"

Severus hadn't heard Sirius' voice sound like this, ever, he didn't think. It was near impossible to resist, and the way the man squirmed some more, the sheets bunching up under him, made him forget he was nervous at all. He passed his hands over Sirius' thighs, from his knees and up to the deep V of his pelvis and let himself get bolder when Sirius keened. He brushed his fingers over his boyfriend's balls, light and tentative, and sucked in a breath at the effect it had. 

Sirius' hands flexed over the covers, his mouth fell open, and the moan he gave him finally prompted Severus to close his own hand around the man's cock. _What a show._

"Yes, yes, just like that, fuck, Sev, please," Sirius bucked under Severus touch, his eyes flying open once more. 

Severus watched him, the way his eyes looked glassy and his tattooed chest flushed, the way his thighs contracted every so often, the way the coarse curls at the base of his cock brushed against his hand every time he stroked down. It was entrancing, and yet it wasn't enough. His trousers weren't comfortable anymore, and they weren't close enough, and there was not enough air in the room. 

So he had to find some in Sirius' mouth. 

He got down to his elbows a little too abruptly and Sirius immediately caught on. His hands left the sheets to tangle in Severus' hair while his legs wound around Severus' own, his lips parting so their tongues could meet. 

"What do you want, Severus?" He asked. 

"What do I… oh," Severus caught on.

"Want to fuck me? Want to ride me? Want to lay on your back, what do you want?" 

The array of possibilities made Severus' mind swim, too many choices, too little experience. 

"I want to feel you," he whispered in the end, "Want to be inside you… I… I don't think I can…"

Sirius nodded, his hands a little desperate in how they pushed Severus' hair out of his face, "That's good, that's perfect, I'm on board, okay?"

Severus sucked in his bottom lip, biting on it. 

"Okay," he said, and then he got up, and got rid of the last of his clothes too, trying as best he could to not focus on the way Sirius watched him. It was hard, so hard, not to run away and hide in a corner. 

"You're doing brilliantly, come back here," Sirius called him, leaning up on his elbows. 

The mattress sank under his knees, and then under his hands too, as Severus made his way back to his boyfriend, both their bodies naked for the first time. 

"You're going to need--"

Severus smiled at him as he interrupted him, " _Accio_ jar,"

Sirius gave him a curious look, and then laughed when said jar made it into Severus' outstretched hand. He opened it with slightly unsteady hands, trying to muster the same quiet assurance he'd managed to build when he did this by himself. 

"You have lube? You actually have lube handy?" Sirius asked, a little breathlessly. 

Severus chose not to answer. He stuck two fingers in the jar, feeling the slightly sticky liquid magically coat his fingers just right, then pushed it away and kneeled back between Sirius' legs. 

It was a bit intimidating still, seeing his boyfriend, bare, panting, his legs spread on the bed on either side of him, and his arse presented to him, waiting. And then it got even harder, both to breathe and to concentrate on doing what he was meant to do because Sirius chuckled lowly and started brushing his hands down his own body. His fingers skimmed the sides of his pelvis, revived his erection in quick strokes before going further down, Severus' eyes trained on them as Sirius planted his feet on the mattress, scooted down closer, and parted his arse cheeks. 

"Touch me? Please," 

"Bloody hell," Severus cursed.

"Bloody hell?" Sirius burst out laughing, "Are you okay?" 

"I'm great, shut up, Sirius," 

And then he did shut up. 

And then Severus managed to grab his wits to him and reach forward. He'd done this to himself, he'd done this so many times, it wasn't hard.

He went a little too hard at first, humiliatingly clumsy, but Sirius only smiled, and steadied his wrist before letting it go and just watching him and enjoying what he did. That last part was what allowed Severus to pause the overthinking - Sirius looked, and sounded, like he was enjoying this, very much so.

Barely a finger in and Sirius was contorting on the mattress already, panting. 

"Oh fuck, oh fuck, more,"

Severus gave it to him. He made sure his one finger slipped in and out easily and that there was still enough lube to coat the second one as needed and started fitting the tip of it past Sirius' rim too. 

"I love… love how you watch me," Sirius gasped, his eyes closing when both Severus' fingers were snug inside him and Severus started feeling the walls around them, pumping his fingers gently. 

"I'm only checking your reactions," Severus said, surprised to hear his voice veiled in arousal too. 

"Whatever love, it feels amazing." Sirius said, and before he could be interrupted he added, "You can go harder,"

Severus had always been the kind to rewrite the instructions in the books he was given, but for once, he preferred following Sirius' lead. So he went harder. His long fingers testing the tightness of his boyfriend's hole, trying to match the sensation with that which he'd felt while fingering himself many a night before, trying to elicit more of the harsh moans Sirius couldn't seem to keep in. 

It worked beautifully, the more Severus fucked his fingers in, the more he pulled gently at the Sirius rim, and then when, emboldened by the man's reactions again, he closed his free hand around his cock… Sirius was panting a little wildly. 

"If you intend on fucking me at some point, you might want to get inside me now, Sev, I'm not joking," 

"Bossy," Severus laughed, not trying to cover his nervousness, of course not. 

"Come on," Sirius gently pulled his fingers out, then patted the sheets for the abandoned jar, and retrieved some with an appreciative hum. "Did you make this yourself?" 

"Yes, I… experimented," Severus said, and then choked on his own saliva when Sirius gave him a noncommittal hum and closed his slick fist around his cock. "Fuck," 

"Yups, that's the idea," Sirius grinned. Severus loved the way his hair fell on his shoulders the way he was leaning on his elbows, he looked so carefree. 

"You find yourself amusing, I assume?" 

"Not exactly no, horny though? Yes, yes very much,"

That made Severus laugh. 

"So crude." 

"Only for you," Sirius made a kissy face before grinning again. 

"I've never heard a bigger lie. Now stop talking, I'm busy," Severus bit back a laugh of his own when Sirius faked trying to swat his arm for that one, and then finally, took his cock in hand, his eyes nearly rolling back at the contact, and lined himself up with Sirius' hole. Only then did he look up into his boyfriend's eyes again, biting his bottom lip as Sirius nodded. He pushed in, slowly. He pushed all the way in, and very nearly moaned right away. 

This was nothing he’d ever felt before. Nothing he'd ever even dreamt of. 

Sirius cursed, and cursed again, his thighs tensed and relaxed almost too fast around Severus hips, and then he looped his legs around his waist, and pushed him in the rest of the way with his ankles, groaning. 

"Fuck yes, you feel so good, go so deep, shit, _fuck_ ," Sirius babbled. 

"You make a habit of swearing like this during sex?" Severus managed to say - how, when he was in very much the same state as the other man, he didn't know. 

"Make me shut up if you can," Sirius challenged him, wiggling his eyebrows good-naturedly. 

His cheeks were flushed, his eyes a bit glassy, he looked gorgeous. Severus took the invitation. It took some rearranging, and he was pretty sure he elbowed Sirius' thigh when he leaned down over him, but the other man just kept pushing his hips down to fuck himself on Severus' cock. 

"I love you, fucking… Merlin's beard, I love you so--"

Severus didn't let him finish. He still hadn't grown used to hearing Sirius say those words, and they felt new in his own mouth still, even if he'd said them a few times already. He didn't know if he could take that and fuck the man at the same time. Too much. Too quickly. 

So he made him shut up, by kissing him. 

_We're making love_ , Severus' brain very unhelpfully provided. That he was capable of such thoughts was a well-guarded secret. 

Until he realized, looking into Sirius' eyes as they drew back for air, that he'd said it out loud. 

"Yes, yes we are, Sev," Sirius breathed, his hands back to threading in the wisps of his hair at the nape of his neck. "Come on, give me more." 

Severus felt his cheeks heat up. He blinked a few times, and then snapped his hips forward, smiled at the gasp it pulled out of Sirius. And did it again. And again. And before either of them knew it, they were both sweating against each other, breathing hard in each other's neck, whispering things to each other that they'd never said, or that Sirius had only half-mumbled while drunk, in the past. 

Severus came with Sirius' name on his lips, and the realization that he was whimpering love declarations in lieu of curses, and Sirius joined him with a groan of his own, his spend wet between them. It was messy. It was them. Hair plastered to their respective foreheads and necks, strong arms wrapped around each other and Sirius' legs falling back to the bed just as Severus slipped out. Catching their breaths against each other's cheeks. 

"You talk, too," Sirius whispered when they'd been silent for a while. 

Severus groaned in answer. 

"I love it."

"Of course you do, you never shut up,"

"Which _you_ love," Sirius poked his hip, chuckling when Severus once again grumbled. 

"I'm reconsidering," he told him, but then he looked up from where he'd been resting his head on Sirius' shoulder, and met Sirius' gaze - just making sure he knew…

"You don't mean that, so I'm okay."

Severus faked a huff before reaching up to press their lips together again. 

"Scratch that," Sirius whispered against his lips, "I'm fantastic." 


End file.
